The waiting is the worst. As the time for the scan draws nearer, the complete ‘otherness’ of Champery and the Swiss mountain air is appealing. Ross comes up for the weekend but otherwise I am largely left to my own devices, to meditate, do yoga, work on the book, garden and read.
Cousin Christine, and Geneva friends Anne and Jenny come up and one night I cook, another we go out. In between we attempt a walk in the Barme, amongst the fields of wild flowers, but are defeated by heavy rain. Repair to the Cantine for some warming soup, and to dry in front of the stove. Overall the weather is disappointing.
Back in London I have another session with D, the healer. Same routine: chat a bit and then lie down. I hadn’t noticed the huge crystal underneath the bed last time – it reminds me of Stretch’s crystal lady at Mana Pools, and the stones she embedded in the trees by one of the pans. Today I find it hard to go under, my brain is buzzing with thoughts, and I feel strangely anxious. I do however doze off at one stage and wake myself with a huge snore!
When I come round D says that she felt my energies were very low during the healing: that I am running on empty and must take time to rest and look after myself. To stop and centre, wherever I am, especially before a long flight. She is surprised as my outward persona is so energised and bubbly. But she says I do have the ability to draw on my inner resources; and I must not underestimate how tiring all this travelling is, and the simple act of taking control of my life and trying to overcome the cancer is very draining. The active mind and anxieties are signs that I am acknowledging what I normally suppress: more mediation is needed to quieten the mind. She also said it was good that I was having my tests in a waning moon, as this is the best time. Waxing and full moons can affect results; fillings can fall out when done at the wrong time (really? anyone have an experience of this?).
This resonates exactly with what Prof Ang has said, and what Dr Keith found when she took my pulse and blood pressure. I still feel very tired, with low energy levels, and weight hovering at 52kgs, even after relenting a bit in Switzerland and having cheese and some chicken livers! But Dr Fi says that the long term effect of reducing the alcohol and dairy intake will be substantial weight loss, so I shouldn’t read too much into that. Gosh, I must have been drinking a lot!
She gives me a an homeopathic cancer remedy, Narrayam Essiac, a formula devised by a Canadian nurse in 1922, to cleanse the blood and nourish individual cells, enhancing their strength and integrity.Made from four main herbs: Burdock root, Sheep Sorrel, Slippery Elm and Indian Rhubarb root.
On Monday I have the first B12 jabs, and the scan. Bring it on…the waiting is almost over.
June 21, 2014 at 10:59 am
Hi Vicky The waiting is definitely the worst – I tried to book a mammogram about a month ago and was told to wait until 27 August! – have already left it too long but hopefully all will be well. I still guzzle far too much white wine whereas you have been incredibly disciplined with your diet and alcohol intake and deserve a good result – make sure you have a huge glass of champagne when you hear the good news! Love and hugs xxx
June 22, 2014 at 3:19 am
Vicky, I will be “with you” on Monday and I do hope that here will be some other more physical presences with you as well. I look forward to reading/hearing good news from you on that day. Your journey continues to evoke so many feelings, Love, Always and Forever, Bonnie xoxo
June 22, 2014 at 5:42 am
I’ll be thinking of you Monday. Lots of love
June 22, 2014 at 11:29 am
Hi Vicky, I will be thinking of you on Monday and keeping everything crossed for a really good result. Lots of love from Paul and me xxx
June 22, 2014 at 9:10 pm
Thank you all for your good wishes; will keep you posted, haha!